An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation.
As he was about to get the anesthesia, he asked to speak to his son.
“Yes, Dad, what is it?”
“Don’t be nervous, son; do your best and just remember, if it doesn’t go well, if something happens to me, your mother is going to come and live with you and your wife….”
Email This Post
An elderly couple were killed in an accident and found themselves being given a tour of heaven by Saint Peter. “Here is your Oceanside condo, over there are the tennis courts, swimming pool, and two golf courses. If you need any refreshments, just stop by any of the many bars located throughout the area.” “Heck, Gloria,” the old man hissed when Saint Peter walked off, “we could have been here ten years ago if you hadn’t heard about all that stupid oat bran, wheat germ, and low-fat diets!”
Email This Post
Doctor: Hello. I’m calling about the check you wrote. It came back.
Old Patient: So did my arthritis.
Email This Post
A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor’s office.
‘Is it true,’ she wanted to know, ‘that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life? ‘
‘Yes, I’m afraid so,’ the doctor told her.
There was a moment of silence before the senior lady replied, ‘I’m wondering, then, just how serious is my condition because this prescription is marked ‘NO REFILLS’.’
Email This Post
An old patient goes to a doctor.
Doctor: “What is it that’s brought you here?”
Patient: “An ambulance. Why?”
Email This Post
Old Man : Doctor doctor, I think I need glasses.
Waiter: You certainly do, you’ve just walked into a fast food joint!!
Email This Post
Old Patient: “It must be tough spending all day with your hands in someone’s mouth.”
Dentist: “I just think of it as having my hands in their wallet.”
Email This Post
Doctor: What seems to be your trouble?
Old Patient: When I get up I feel dizzy for one hour.
Doctor: Try getting up one hour later.
Email This Post