Funny & Cute Sayings

Do you have trouble making up your mind? Well, yes or no?

If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.

When I’m not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don’t have film.

You know the speed of light, so what’s the speed of dark?

Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.

Always forgive your enemies – Nothing annoys them so much.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

When everything’s coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.

I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.

I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he’s gone.

Evening news is where they begin with ‘Good evening’, and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.

Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need more.(Friend or Money !)

Death is hereditary.

There are three sides to any argument: your side, my side and the right side.

An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.

Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.

When you’re right, no one remembers. When you’re wrong, no one forgets.

Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.

Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.

Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.

They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance.

Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.

I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.

If you can’t see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.

Where there’s a will, there are five hundred relatives.

Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

(21 votes, average: 4.48 out of 5)

hi, on May 2nd, 2007 Said:

awe
christina, on October 19th, 2008 Said:

a kiss blown is a kiss wasted, the only kind of kiss is a kiss tasted. you should add this one to your website
Donte Moniak, on April 24th, 2010 Said:

Michael Jackson is simply brilliant. The entire world misses you so much! No-one could possibly argue that Michael has not revolutionized pop songs and pop culture in many countries. He was a music genuis and that he was the inspiration for many artists which were to come after him. I’m sure Michael is making music and videos in heaven.
Double 5s, on February 9th, 2011 Said:

+1 person loved this

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