Funny Phrases – Answer the questions if you can:)

Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars, and he’ll believe you.
Tell him a bench has wet paint, and he has to touch it.

How come SUPERMAN could stop bullets with his chest,
but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?

If it was only a 3 hour cruise, why did MRS. HOWELL have so many clothes.

Why is it called a HAMBURGER, when it’s made out of BEEF?

Why does SOUR CREAM have an Expiration date?

What would a chair look like, if your knees bent the other way?

If “Con” is the Opposite of “Pro”….then what is the opposite of PROGRESS?

Why is LEMON JUICE mostly artificial ingredients….
but DISH WASHING LIQUID comtains real lemons?

How much deeper would the ocean be, if SPONGES didn’t grow in it?

Why buy a product that it takes 2000 flushes to get rid of?

Why do we wait until a PIG is dead, to “CURE” it?

Why do we wash BATH TOWELS-aren’t we clean when we use them?

Why do we put SUITS in a Garment Bag, and put Garments in a Suitcase?

Why doesn’t GLUE stick to the inside of the bottle?

Do Roman paramedics refer to IV’s as “4’s”?

Whose cruel idea was it for the word “Lisp” to have an “S” in it?

What do little birdies see, when they get knocked unconscious?

If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself,
is it considered a hostage situation?

Instead of talking to your plants, if you yelled at them would they still grow,
only to be troubled and insecure?

What’s another word for synonym?

Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?

When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?

When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?

Where do forest rangers go to “get away from it all”?

Why isn’t there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why do they report power outages on TV?

What should you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an endangered plant?

Is it possible to be totally partial?

If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

Would a fly that loses its wings be called a walk?

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?

If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their headlights off?

If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?

If a man speaks in the forest and there is no woman to hear him, is he still wrong?

If a turtle loses his shell, is it naked or homeless?

Why don’t sheep shrink when it rains?

Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?

If the cop arrests a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

(19 votes, average: 4.63 out of 5)
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11 Responses to “Funny Phrases – Answer the questions if you can:)”

  1. Alyssa, on September 17th, 2007 Said:

    “a guy must have designed this bathroom, there’s no place on the door for my purse!”

  2. robin and adam, on February 26th, 2009 Said:

    Why isn’t there mouse-flavored cat food?
    because cats dont hunt mice to eat them.

  3. robin and adam, on February 26th, 2009 Said:

    Why is it called a HAMBURGER, when it’s made out of BEEF?

    because the hamburger was created in germany in a place called hamburg.

  4. Emmalee, on April 10th, 2009 Said:

    Cats eat Mice. Or maybe my cats are just crazy..

  5. Vedang, on September 10th, 2009 Said:

    Why do they report power outages on TV?
    So people with generators can find out and hopefully spread the message

  6. rachel, on September 24th, 2009 Said:

    if a man speaks in the forest with no woman to here him yes, he is still wrong.

  7. rachel, on September 24th, 2009 Said:

    if vegitarians eat vegetables, humanitarians eat vegitarians.

  8. rachel, on September 24th, 2009 Said:

    forest rangers go to New York City to get away from it all. There or a mental asylums padded room.

  9. Isabel, on November 16th, 2009 Said:

    “Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?” Because those who are loudest are usually the most popular, and usually the stupidest.

  10. Isabel, on November 16th, 2009 Said:

    “If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?” Not really because it is only one person, therefore it is suicide. But if it is only one of the personalities, maybe their other ones will be scared and think they are being hostage. But those other personalties don’t have families to worry about!

  11. Kyle, on January 20th, 2010 Said:

    Why do banks charge overdraft fees when they Know we don’t have any money in the account?